What Burning Man Taught Me About Following My Joy
"Choose intimacy," my new friend Mark said to me, as we stood outside a geodesic dome at Anahasana Village at Burning Man. "There are a thousand things you could be doing at any moment at the Burn," he continued. "Pick the one thing that'
Heading to My First Burn — and Finding Joy in the Ephemeral
In a few days, I'll be heading out to my first Burning Man and joining 80,000 people in a temporary metropolis in the middle of the Nevada desert. I'm feeling super excited. My wife and I decided just a week ago that we'd
Chasing Freedom
I spent much of my life chasing freedom. Growing up, I chased the freedom of escaping my family’s roots in San Francisco Chinatown and living a richer life. I felt so proud when I graduated from MIT and landed my first engineering job at Google — they were my golden
Men's Circles and Learning to Feel Our Emotions
We're sitting cross-legged in a circle on the wooden floor — a dozen men in total — as we each share a check-in on how we're all feeling. We'd gathered for three days at an ecolodge in Bali to take a deep dive into what it
How Your Feelings, Not Your Thoughts, Create the Freedom You Want
“What's the cage that you're breaking people free from?” Jonny asked. I closed my eyes. The question had unexpectedly touched a chord in my heart. Before I could open my mouth to even respond, I already found tears streaming down my face. It was my turn
Build Your Tension Muscle and Create the Success You Want in Life
Several years ago, I committed to a daily Uncomfortable Conversation challenge. At the time, I was working with an amazing coach on taking up more space in conversations. I'd been struggling with telling engaging stories, with interrupting when I had something to add, and with being more vulnerable
5 Lessons Nomadic Travel Taught Me About How to Spend My Energy
One year ago, my wife Candace and I started traveling the world as nomads, with just a carry-on and a small backpack each. It'd been both a dream and fear of mine for a while. I dreamt of the freedom — an opportunity of a lifetime to create an
Coming Home to My Roots: A Journey in Loving the Parts of Me I'd Once Rejected
For a long time, I rejected my roots. I come from a family of immigrants. 23andMe says I’m 99% Chinese — the last 1% could be anything. My family owns the longest-running Chinese medicine and herb store in San Francisco Chinatown. It turns 50 this year. When I was young,
Letting The Gift of Presence Be Enough
Last Wednesday evening, I witnessed my grandma Ma Ma, 95, take her last breath. A dozen of us — my family and my aunts, uncles, and cousins — gathered around her bedside at my parents’ house, feeling the heavy solemness in our shared silence. Amidst the sadness, I knew I was lucky
What 350+ Conversations in Uber and Lyft Rides Taught Me About Intimacy
For two years, I played a game to practice the art and science of human connection in every Lyft or Uber ride I took — 350+ rides in total. Every ride, I'd hop into the front seat and make it my goal to get into as deep of a